Eppendorf International's advert for epMotion, the world's first automatic pipetting system.
That's right my fellow scientists, now we can focus more on candlelit bed-throbbing rather than the transportation method of your precious cell cultures.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
But I don't believe in unicorns, let alone want to ride yours.
So I decided to join a NYC networking site out of curiosity (which is why I do most things, aside from ambition) and to meet new folks.
This guy sent a message asking how many times I've been told that I look like Angelina Jolie.
Okay, he's trying to pay me a compliment. I can't bite his head off for it, I think to myself. I reply in a civil manner. I look at his page. He's into metaphysics, Deepak Chopra and "The Secret". Pretty much the whole "New Thought Movement" which consists of retard "prophets" that write redundant, tiring books and seminars/dvds on self-searching via "The Law of Attraction", etc. Considering the fact that my enter liberal arts major here (if I wasn't pursuing engineering, which is highly unlikely) thesis would probably be a relentless argument ripping that whole "movement" into weeping shreds, I doubt we would get on. I'm not a spiritual person. I'd like to think that I am capable of being spiritually tolerant, but who am I trying to fool? I regret to admit even that is a far stretch for me. Sorray!
Anyway. With all of that said, I also feel that it would be self-defeating to automatically dismiss him for our differences, or based on my quick biased judgment of his interweb profile. After all, take my silkworm anecdotes, nerves of steel and ambitious time line dreams away and who am I?
My compadres, sure we like to recognize that our ideas of reasoning and the convictions we stand by are some kind of mighty or even intriguing. But denying one's stupid douchery convictions that is not your own is just cheap and wrong. (That was a "no shit, sherlock" moment.)
I accept his obnoxiously flashing IM invitation.
Here's how the thrilling conversation went:
Him: really? how many times have you been told you look like blah blah?
Me: Zero, like I said in the e-mail. Remember? ;)
(Note: The "remember?" and smiley face emoticon serves as a way of showing playfulness. Remorse, if you will.)
Him: So do you like sports or the fighting arts?
Me: I can't say that I do. I'm very physically active and much of a trekker, but sports and martial arts fail to keep my interest.
Me: Maybe dodge ball, but only because I once got hit in the face during a game and found it to be funny. Since then, I've assumed it to be funny whenever anyone got hit in the face with a ball.
Me: Oh, and maybe soccer, too. But only because it's cool for Americans to rant and rave about soccer while knowing absolutely nothing about it. :D <---(Read: More hopeful remorse.)
Him: yeah I'm not that into sports or martials either, really
(Note: Doctor Unicorn Trainer's got sports/martial arts listed as his main interests. Along with spirituality, the Universe and *"meta energy"--but let's not nitpick here.)
(-----awkward interweb-space-time pause, due to me playing with my septum ring and perhaps him biting his nails-----)
Him: so what do you like to do? what do you enjoy?
Me: how is your day so far? (Read: I'm getting to be cheap with my meaningful emoticons. Srsly.)
Me: My mile-long interests are listed on my page, and they're pretty interesting to begin with. I would say the same about yours, after all, I did read your page before contacting you. I would think this is a natural process. (Read: Your interests of meta-unicorns-self-help are only interesting because I don't agree with them and am charitable!)
Him: sound and music? I love music.
Slings and arrows! Slings and arrows, betch!
*A. J. Ayer is turning in his grave right now.
This guy sent a message asking how many times I've been told that I look like Angelina Jolie.
Okay, he's trying to pay me a compliment. I can't bite his head off for it, I think to myself. I reply in a civil manner. I look at his page. He's into metaphysics, Deepak Chopra and "The Secret". Pretty much the whole "New Thought Movement" which consists of retard "prophets" that write redundant, tiring books and seminars/dvds on self-searching via "The Law of Attraction", etc. Considering the fact that my enter liberal arts major here (if I wasn't pursuing engineering, which is highly unlikely) thesis would probably be a relentless argument ripping that whole "movement" into weeping shreds, I doubt we would get on. I'm not a spiritual person. I'd like to think that I am capable of being spiritually tolerant, but who am I trying to fool? I regret to admit even that is a far stretch for me. Sorray!
Anyway. With all of that said, I also feel that it would be self-defeating to automatically dismiss him for our differences, or based on my quick biased judgment of his interweb profile. After all, take my silkworm anecdotes, nerves of steel and ambitious time line dreams away and who am I?
My compadres, sure we like to recognize that our ideas of reasoning and the convictions we stand by are some kind of mighty or even intriguing. But denying one's stupid douchery convictions that is not your own is just cheap and wrong. (That was a "no shit, sherlock" moment.)
I accept his obnoxiously flashing IM invitation.
Here's how the thrilling conversation went:
Him: really? how many times have you been told you look like blah blah?
Me: Zero, like I said in the e-mail. Remember? ;)
(Note: The "remember?" and smiley face emoticon serves as a way of showing playfulness. Remorse, if you will.)
Him: So do you like sports or the fighting arts?
Me: I can't say that I do. I'm very physically active and much of a trekker, but sports and martial arts fail to keep my interest.
Me: Maybe dodge ball, but only because I once got hit in the face during a game and found it to be funny. Since then, I've assumed it to be funny whenever anyone got hit in the face with a ball.
Me: Oh, and maybe soccer, too. But only because it's cool for Americans to rant and rave about soccer while knowing absolutely nothing about it. :D <---(Read: More hopeful remorse.)
Him: yeah I'm not that into sports or martials either, really
(Note: Doctor Unicorn Trainer's got sports/martial arts listed as his main interests. Along with spirituality, the Universe and *"meta energy"--but let's not nitpick here.)
(-----awkward interweb-space-time pause, due to me playing with my septum ring and perhaps him biting his nails-----)
Him: so what do you like to do? what do you enjoy?
Me: how is your day so far? (Read: I'm getting to be cheap with my meaningful emoticons. Srsly.)
Me: My mile-long interests are listed on my page, and they're pretty interesting to begin with. I would say the same about yours, after all, I did read your page before contacting you. I would think this is a natural process. (Read: Your interests of meta-unicorns-self-help are only interesting because I don't agree with them and am charitable!)
Him: sound and music? I love music.
Slings and arrows! Slings and arrows, betch!
*A. J. Ayer is turning in his grave right now.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
When Pseudoscientists Enjoy Playing Profit...I mean, er, Prophet.
"It seems undeniable that consciousness can’t change unless the brain does, yet mysteriously, it’s the invisible desire of the mind that alters the material landscape of the brain, not vice versa."
-Deepak Chopra
I'm sorry, but this is what my brain was able to process:
It seems undeniable that a wave cannot move unless the water does, yet mysteriously, it’s the invisible desire of the wave that alters the material landscape of the water, not vice versa.
-Deepak Chopra
I'm sorry, but this is what my brain was able to process:
It seems undeniable that a wave cannot move unless the water does, yet mysteriously, it’s the invisible desire of the wave that alters the material landscape of the water, not vice versa.
Monday, February 11, 2008
Friday, January 18, 2008
And the 2008
"So Low You Are Drowning in Pig Shit and There is No Looking Back Award" goes to...
"Tonya", for the justifiable (she even gives reasons! OMG!) rage she displays in an African-American Literature Book Club Forum. I'd like to give writer Linda "Wredd" Watkins (rational and educated, hopefully a meat-eater) a pound for offering said douche a position in a project right after "Tonya's" tiring attempts at pulling her hair.
Classic quotes from the modern hitler bull(because you are just as bad)*:
"Chapelle is the classic case of a self-hating nigger. His marriage to an Asian is proof to me; and his type of comedy speaks volumes."
(reply to a comment on how everyone has the right to be with whom they choose, regardless of race)
"No they don't. Since when were they given these rights?? They are better off trying not to worry about what people think. Cuz they are fools if they think they have ANY rights to what another person thinks. "
In addition to winning this award, you've also managed to pave your way into today's growing population of the stubborn and uneducated.
*Hey-I'm allowed to make such outlandish assumptions and large claims. After all, I am a fan of Hitchens. ;)
"Tonya", for the justifiable (she even gives reasons! OMG!) rage she displays in an African-American Literature Book Club Forum. I'd like to give writer Linda "Wredd" Watkins (rational and educated, hopefully a meat-eater) a pound for offering said douche a position in a project right after "Tonya's" tiring attempts at pulling her hair.
Classic quotes from the modern hitler bull(because you are just as bad)*:
"Chapelle is the classic case of a self-hating nigger. His marriage to an Asian is proof to me; and his type of comedy speaks volumes."
(reply to a comment on how everyone has the right to be with whom they choose, regardless of race)
"No they don't. Since when were they given these rights?? They are better off trying not to worry about what people think. Cuz they are fools if they think they have ANY rights to what another person thinks. "
In addition to winning this award, you've also managed to pave your way into today's growing population of the stubborn and uneducated.
*Hey-I'm allowed to make such outlandish assumptions and large claims. After all, I am a fan of Hitchens. ;)
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Dear Apple, SLOW THE FUCK DOWN!
Before I could even contemplate about buying an ipod, Apple releases the sleek, 160GB with video and photo space. I wet my pants, and play with the extra options. Before I could even contemplate over which version to get-nano or classic-they
release the ipod touch. Now, there's a nano video and of course,the god/iphone.
I give up.
I tend to lose about 4-5 cell phones within a year and I'm usually rushing around subway platforms hoping not to crush someone with my carelessness, so such luxuries would not be practical for me.
But it's all good. Bravo Apple! I'm game with my MacBook and supremo ultimate WWIII MacBook Pro, which is currently being built and renovated for extra x 1000 survival skills.
FEATURING THE NEW MACBOOK AIR; The world's thinnest notebook.
...............
ENOUGH!
Next will be the MacBook Air Pro, and I will rage.
release the ipod touch. Now, there's a nano video and of course,the god/iphone.
I give up.
I tend to lose about 4-5 cell phones within a year and I'm usually rushing around subway platforms hoping not to crush someone with my carelessness, so such luxuries would not be practical for me.
But it's all good. Bravo Apple! I'm game with my MacBook and supremo ultimate WWIII MacBook Pro, which is currently being built and renovated for extra x 1000 survival skills.
FEATURING THE NEW MACBOOK AIR; The world's thinnest notebook.
...............
ENOUGH!
Next will be the MacBook Air Pro, and I will rage.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
The "I Can't Believe You Invented This Before I DID!" Award Goes To...
The Monome duo, for inventing the Monome; a reconfigurable and adaptable device that connects to your computer via usb to control just about anything. From drum machines/loopers to physics models and math games. It's everything a midi controller wishes it could be: simple.
Highlight? It's open source.
If you've salivated into a puddle of fresh drool by now, you should be able to relate to my initial reaction to such a godly creation.
You can bet your ass my social skills will disintegrate quicker than a World of Warcraft's.
Highlight? It's open source.
If you've salivated into a puddle of fresh drool by now, you should be able to relate to my initial reaction to such a godly creation.
Six impressive models have been produced, zero available.
Although the "current availability" section may have KRUSHED me, there will be a new batch available (100 units each for the first edition) for both models #128 and #64 within a month.
You can bet your ass my social skills will disintegrate quicker than a World of Warcraft's.
100 units?
...this is a piece of robot junk, don't buy it.
...this is a piece of robot junk, don't buy it.
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